Do you play not to lose, or for the love of the game?

22nd June, 2013.

As I sat watching the NBA finals, something came to mind seeing the world react to the NBA finals – the heartbreak shared by San Antonians (and sympathizers) when the Spurs sunk game 6, and the joy (and ensuing trash talk) shared by Miami fans when the Heat cinched the title – do we play games (sports) for the pleasure of the game, or do we simply play to win?

As superficial a question as this have initially seemed, the more and more I thought about it, the deeper it seemed to get – I tried to find the answer to my question with an open mind, trying not to get too judgmental, whatever the answer, because whatever the answer, it would shed some light on who I am – rather, what particular set of compulsions or actions define this part of my personality. 

Alright – so playing to win. Most of my life, in most of the things I’ve done (like I said, the answers I found didn’t necessarily restrict themselves to sports) – I’ve done to “win”. So when I play a game with the intention and objective to win, what happens? Well, what happened to the Spurs in game 6 with 5.8 seconds to go? They gave the game their everything, but when they smelled the finish line, when they (probably, almost certainly, no matter with how small a part of their mind) started fantasizing about lifting that trophy, they softened. Hesitated. What if I make a mistake, taking this jump shot, or making this play, and so on and so forth. Then you recede, don’t give it your all – then, against all your wishes, you lose the game anyway. The losing team doesn’t care about any of that, they’re in there giving it their all. And they won, didn’t they?

When you play to win, something within you stops you from giving your absolute fullest to the game. And nothing, absolutely nothing other than giving a game your everything, will give you a shot at winning. Do you see the irony in this?  You play to win – so you become completely aware of everything you do in the game : when your mind isn’t completely in the game, and is in fact thinking about what to do and what not to do, you’re finished. Even if you win, it won’t be enough for you. 

Let’s say you don’t give a rat’s ass about winning the game – and you just play. Play your heart out. If you win, you win. If you lose, you lose. But you lose knowing that you couldn’t have done it any differently! When you play just for the hell of it, just for the love of the game, whatever the outcome of that game, it doesn’t matter to you. I find this just ever so subtle and beautiful – try this the next time you’re in a pickup game, playing whatever – even if it’s a game of bowling or curling you somehow got roped into. Play it like a kid, give it your absolute everything. Lose yourself in it – you will see that you enjoy the experience on a very different level. I’ve seen this. 

I’ve played sports in my life – tennis, cricket, basketball, what have you – always with the aim of winning. It was frustrating, every single time, knowing that I had more, and that I was somehow holding back. That’s the difference between the man who plays every possession like his life depends on it and the man who plays every possession with the aim of dominating the opponent. The difference is that one way is a beautiful way of living, the other is an ugly abomination, even if you have the world’s adulation.

Losing isn’t fun when you play to win. Winning means nothing when you play for the love of the game. That’s the beauty of it.